I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize