So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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