Its about making memories worth repressing
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize