Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
His hands were made for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize