i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
So apparently I’m into choking now
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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