when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize