you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize