too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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