didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize