she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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