Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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