hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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