I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize