I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I think my vagina is haunted
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize