be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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