never play flip cup with pint glasses
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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