somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Randomize