I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize