So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize