'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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