THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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