you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize