remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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