Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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