Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize