i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
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