I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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