I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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