I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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