you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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