yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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