YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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