singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
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