Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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