Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize