I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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