Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
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