fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize