I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
We had to coat check the pizza.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize