Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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