Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize