Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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