I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize