And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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