THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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