summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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