She's JV to your varsity
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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