It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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