I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
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i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
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I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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