I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize